Do not underestimate the power of rock bottom. Rock bottom is where everything becomes possible. And while none of us needs to visit there more than once or twice in a lifetime, when it’s your turn, just let go and stop trying to save yourself. Race down as fast as you can. We all have […]
Category: How to do life
Stop drinking now or you are going to get cancer and die slowly and alone, probably ugly crying.
There is a different life than the one your wine-sipping, margarita Tuesday, beer-with-the-guys self is currently living, hiding just on the flip side of your current reality. And it’s different, harder, and better. Here’s why. Many people in your life are not as interesting as you want to believe they are. This sounds like a […]
A 25 year scavenger hunt for love, through a forest of sex and acceptance
I lost count of my partners when my numbers passed my age in my early 20’s. After 3 cancelled engagements by age 22 and sincere, heartfelt efforts at trying to be a good mate, it was clear I didn’t have the chips to play the poker game of love, with myself or with another person. […]
Tao – 8
…Live in a good place. Keep your mind deep. Treat others well. Stand by your word. Keep good order. Do the right thing. Work when it’s time…
Tao – 5 Heaven and Earth are not kind
The ten thousand things are straw dogs to them. Sages are not kind: People are straw dogs to them. Yet Heaven and Earth and all the space between Are like a bellows: Empty but inexhaustible, Always producing more. Longwinded speech is exhausting Better to stay centered.
When your pain isn’t yours
I wasn’t born understanding how to connect to my own feelings. It’s a learned skill and I’ve worked hard to earn a deep and powerful toolset that fits around it. It works incredibly well, if sometimes slower and with more effort than other people expect. So when I find myself suffering in ways go on […]
Telling the Truth
I just came from a party. I met some lovely people. I ate a little cake. I wanted to be at this party. I wanted to be with these people. I also felt strange and sad today and like I could probably ruin any good party just by showing up. There were balloons. There were […]
Forged by fire – 2 kinds of anger, 2 kinds of pain
I woke up yesterday in a crazy fever. Officially queued up to be the most fun-packed weekend of the holiday season, I had to cancel everything while I dove into a painful, soaking wet alternate state for about 8 hours. I don’t remember a lot of it. I remember ungodly pain everywhere. I remember going […]
Letting go of Christmas
I have gotten pretty decent at letting go of things. I have data to support this assertion. I swear I didn’t totally make it up. But thinking you have gotten pretty decent at something is generally an indicator of a big, hairy blindspot in which you enjoy your smug oblivion, sucking hard in clear sight […]
The most important thing you can ever understand about anger
Anger is the manifestation of you thinking something should be different than it is. Test it out. A brilliant friend told me this at exactly the right moment, many years ago. I righteously disagreed with him and then started observing – and there were no exceptions. Anger is always the manifestation of you thinking something […]